Goal Busting Formula

As mentioned last week, there really is a formula for making your big goals actually happen, and it takes more than thinking and wishing them to come true. So, there is a kind of formula for successful goal setting that you need to apply to all your big goals.

• Be clear about what you want and go big.
• Set lots of small goals broken up into daily and weekly goals so they feel, and actually are, achievable.
• Write your goals down and review them often.
• Remember to always keep busy. Research suggests that a broad goal of simply staying busy is better than doing nothing and will help keep you happy.
• It takes 66 days to change a habit and 80 days to develop a solid, healthy habit so keep working at your goal until pushing through those steps become the habit you want it to be.
• When it comes to that good ol’ self-talk, it has been shown that asking yourself rather than telling yourself that you are going to reach a goal is much more effective. So, start asking the question “Can I reach my goal of _______?” Then answer by saying “Yes, I can!”
• The key to change and control is “awareness”. Pound that into your head. Always be aware and observe your internal dialog, paying close attention to what you are thinking. Yes, that’s thinking about thinking and if you do that consistently you will find that it helps you see what you need to change and how to change it.
• According to David DiSalvo’s book, What Makes the Brain Happy and Why You Should Do the Opposite, you should spend more time reading about people who use self-control and discipline. By doing that, you will boost your own self-control and self-discipline.

Now that you have a list to go by, go ahead! Create those goals and take the steps needed to make them happen! It’s just not enough to really want it. Take action and use your desire and passion to fuel it.

Next week, we’ll talk about ways to make reaching your goal even easier.

Don’t Live Without Passion.

It doesn’t take much thought to realize that life really is too short, so you just have to live every day with more passion! Time squandered, is time wasted.

Most people, when looking back at their lives, are in more pain over the things they didn’t do rather than over the things they failed at while trying to do them. Yes, I do believe most of us would rather try and fail than never try at all. Why is that? I think it’s in our nature as humans to want to receive long lasting and deep satisfaction from struggle and hard work, because even if we fall short of our objective, at least we know we tried.

I’ve certainly had my share of failures and tragedies. But I wouldn’t have it any other way because, in most of those failures, I’ve learned so many huge lessons that, in the long run, greatly enhanced my life.

Let me briefly tell you my own story. It was a “Sudden Death Wake Up Call”.

I had a pretty ordinary beginning into this life. Born in Portland, Oregon in 1944 (that means next year I hit the big 80 mark!), I was the second born in my family, so I was always trying to prove myself, to measure up to my older brother.

My life and my mindset were forever shocked and changed when, at the age of 15, my older brother died, literally, at my feet, while playing basketball. We were in an outdoor stadium halfway around the world in Ankara, Turkey. That one life-shaking event permanently altered my way of thinking, something that is with me to this very day, yes, even as I write these words. As I express myself and think about the big picture of life, it helps me understand that life can be gone in a moment. It’s a sobering thought.

Yep, we all have an end to our life, or as some people say, “Nobody gets out of here alive.” It doesn’t matter how rich or powerful you are, you and I really have a fairly short time to be here on planet earth. So, all of us need to live with passion right now and go after the things in life that we really want. Not only will you get more out of life, but it will also give you a great and powerful lift to your mind and body.

Next week I am going to write more about this event with my brother and how it pushed me to see the bigger picture of life and death. It makes me much more accepting of our hardships and every day it pushes me to live in this “right now moment”. I’ll write more about my early life and goals that I set for myself, some of which I reached but not all of them!

Road to Long-Term Happiness

I was looking through my past posts this week and came across one that mentions a great book, Authentic Happiness, by Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D. and was reminded of how important it is to have goals that give us authentic happiness.

In his book, Dr. Seligman talks about what real authentic happiness is and how we can capture it and keep it. Finding and enjoying real happiness is not done through seeking and finding pleasure and the same goes for seeking happiness through just staying busy—it just doesn’t work. Great and authentic happiness is experienced from earned gratification. So how do we become gratified?

Much of our gratification comes from producing something of great value to others and/or ourselves. This gives us a great feeling of satisfaction. Dr. Seligman lists 8 common components of gratification we want to have in the things we pursue:

1. The task is challenging and requires skill.
2. We have to concentrate.
3. There are clear goals.
4. We get immediate feedback.
5. We have deep effortless involvement.
6. There is a sense of control.
7. Sense of self vanishes.
8. Time seems to stop.

Dr. Seligman goes on to talk about depression in today’s world and how widespread it is. It has increased by a huge amount in the last 40 years and the average age of depressed people is much younger today.

Depression is also unexpectedly high in wealthy and healthy countries. The author’s theory is that “an ethos that builds unwarranted self-esteem, espouses victimology, and encourages rampant individualism has contributed to that epidemic.” Another reason is our huge reliance on shortcuts to happiness… online entertainment, drugs, shopping, spectator sports, and high sugar food and drinks. These things are enjoyable in the moment but don’t give us any long-term satisfaction.

A major symptom of depression is self-absorption, which a lot of shortcuts to happiness can feed. Depressed people think about how they feel a great deal of the time. When they detect internal sadness, they ruminate about it, projecting it into the future, this in turn increases their sadness in their life and across all their activities.

What we all need to do more of is realize that there are no shortcuts to the kind of fulfilling gratification we all crave, and realize we need to focus more and more on our goals, taking on big tasks, and increasing our long-term production as well as giving up the constant self-worry and self-absorption.

You may have noticed that really happy people, for the most part, spend the least amount of time home alone, involved in these shortcuts to happiness. They tend to have a rich and fulfilling social life along with jobs, goals, or hobbies they are passionate about. When your life is built around social and productive activities, you get more of that long-term happiness, feeling gratified for days or weeks or even years to come.  

Surefire Goal Success

To have and use goals in our lives is so very, very important and I sure believe that it was when I set a goal years ago to make it to millionaire status, that this decision became the most critical resolution of my financial life.

Goal setting really is a kind of magic, one that really works. Of course, there are a couple of things that truly drive a person to reach their goals. I’ve written about this before but it’s so important in our lives and, besides, when I write about stuff like this, it pushes me to make sure I keep striving to do these things I’m telling you are so good for your life.

One of the critical things that give you a huge push to accomplish whatever goal you set is writing it down on paper or on your computer. You see, for me, when I write it down, especially on paper, and post it somewhere I can easily see it, I get to review it daily which is a really huge help.

In my book, How to Ignite Your Passion for Living, I have a chapter, Chapter 7, entitled “The Surefire Way to Stick with Every Goal”. Now, let me tell you about this while I basically plagiarize my own writing. (Don’t tell my wife!)

In that chapter, I write about how to stick with your goals, including using B-RAM, which stands for Benefits, Reasons, and Motivations. This is a list of clearly defined reasons why you want to go after your chosen goal. Now, how does that work?

First of all, you have to think through what your big dream is. Second, you want to know for sure that that this big dream is what you really want out of life, and you can do that by writing down all the benefits, reasons, and motivations – your B-RAM. Third, write the goal down with a timeframe attached.

After you know what you want and why, and you have set your goal, you need to work out an action plan, breaking the goal into short and medium interim goals and action items. That list, especially when written down, pushes you to achieve what you have set as your goal. This little formula has worked for me with relationships, making tons of money, and even winning a gold medal in tennis at the Huntsman World Senior Games.

Most experts agree that if the benefits are powerful enough and if we have strong enough reasons, then our motivation will burn white hot inside of us, to the point that nothing in the world can stop us. So, in those moments that you may feel discouraged, take out your B-RAM lists and read them over and over again. This will re-motivate you and, again, turn on all your mental and physical juices and energy. The likelihood of you remaining down or wanting to quit will be much, much less. Believe me–I know it works!

So, I really hope that you will try this and maybe even teach it to others like your kids, your friends, and anyone that you truly want to help!

When You Need An Energy Boost

Life can be busy and draining, especially if you’ve been having a hard time lately or things haven’t been going your way. Even when things are good, it seems like we can all use more energy, especially as we get older. Whether it’s for work or play, family or friends, having that extra energy can make a big difference in how much we enjoy our lives.

You’re not stuck with that low energy though. There are easy things you can do to help boost your energy levels. Here’s a list of 12 proven ways to boost your energy:

1. Set exciting goals that will move you towards making your big dreams a reality. Be sure to include a timeframe and an exciting game plan to keep you motivated.
2. A daily to do list, one that you look at in the morning, gets you focused first thing. The feeling of accomplishment as you work through it adds extra energy to your day.
3. Eat more nutritious foods. Sugars, saturated fat, fried food and empty calorie foods can contribute to crashes in your energy level.
4. Drink green tea rather than coffee to overcome mid-day slumps. It’s still caffeinated but doesn’t have as much and that form of caffeine paired with the L-theanine in green tea improves mood and reduces stress and anxiety.
5. Get plenty of exposure to natural light. Just a short walk in the sunshine first thing in the day can improve energy and mood through the synthesis of vitamin D and the release of serotonin.
6. Ease your stress by simplifying your life and mainly, or exclusively, pursue your life’s priority items. Delegate the rest.
7. Heal yourself by being grateful and loving and letting go of all anger.
8. Drink plenty of water. Dehydration makes you feel fatigued.
9. Play hard and exercise to increase endorphins which boost energizing neurotransmitters like dopamine.
10. Get enough sleep.
11. A few minutes of yoga stretching will give you a morning boost and reduce aches and pains that can drain your energy.
12. Listening to your favorite music is good for your mood. It may be music with a heart pounding beat while others may find symphonic music inspiring and energizing.

There are probably other things that you do that you’ve found work to increase your energy levels. Pay attention to what gets you excited and energized and be sure to work that into your day when you are dragging. It helps to write up your own list and keep it close to remind you of your options when you need an energy boost.

Re-Start Your L-Factor

Last week I started talking about the many important points in my book, How to Ignite Your Passion for Living. One of the really big ones is in the chapter entitled, “Clone Yourself with the Amazing L-Factor.” So, what is that L-Factor? It’s all about making lists!

Show me any super-successful person who has accomplished big things and I’ll show you an accomplished list maker. There is something magical that happens in our brains when we reduce our desires to a list. When we write those items down, it’s like our brains push us to act on them and won’t let us go until we do it.

Of the many specific techniques that have huge value in helping catapult a person to the top of whatever they’re going after, I have to say that list making is at, or near, the top of that list. It’s just flat-out amazing how much more enhanced your life will become and how many more dreams and goals you will be able to achieve by using lists. In addition, daily task lists or to-do lists are the key to keeping track of accomplishing all the bite-size components into which you’ve broken down your big picture goals.

For instance, a number of years back, I talked about how important that first hour of your day can be as the book, The Miracle Morning, talks about. Getting tons done in that first hour can be helped by using that L-factor as well. Just make a list, before you go to bed, of the items and tasks that you want to address in those first 60 minutes. You can break it down to six 10 minute items or four 15 minutes tasks, but no matter how you do it, making a list can, and will, greatly increase the odds of you following through on what you want to accomplish.

So, if you have gotten away from that ole list making habit, it’s probably a good time to re-start making lists in order to drive yourself to get lots of stuff done. And I don’t mean just for that first hour of the day, but make lists for everything, especially your big, huge goals, and read over your list often, checking off those items that you’ve accomplished to give you a boost by seeing how much you’ve accomplished. Then you can give yourself a nice pat on the back for getting the job done!

Life’s Lessons in Failing

17 years ago, I wrote a letter for an advertisement that introduced a book I wrote. I then sent the letter to many friends and followers. I started with this:

Dear friend and reader,

This is my new book on the subject of GOAL SETTING–which I strongly believe I owe my prosperous lifestyle to!

And I still believe that! The book is also full of great stuff that is as useful today as it was then. The book I’m talking about is called How to Ignite Your Passion for Living and I still sell it here.

One of the highlights of the book is the stuff about trying, even if you might fail. It doesn’t take much thought to realize that life is really is too short to not try so we can live our lives with more passion!

Don’t be like those who look back on their lives and realize that they missed out on so many opportunities. The poet Alfred Tennyson said, “It’s better to have tried and failed than to live life wondering what would’ve happened if I had tried.” I do believe most of us would be happier to try and fail than never try at all.

Why is that? I think it’s basic human nature to want those long-lasting good feelings we get from success and, even if we fall short of our objective, knowing we tried. And yes, I certainly had my share of failures and tragedies. But I wouldn’t have it any other way because there is so much to learn from failure if we are paying very close attention. We have the opportunity to realize why we failed and what to do in the future so it won’t happen again that way.

Setting big goals in things that you are interested in is one of the biggest contributors to igniting your passion, even if you fail. I hope you see this and go for those big goals and other things that you want to do with your life. And, as I always preach, be sure to write your goals down. By doing that you are much more likely to achieve those goals. It really works!

Remember, if you fail, don’t give up. Keep trying and study what happened and why so you can keep it from happening again. That’s my challenge to you and to myself. I am, right now as I write this, recovering from heart surgery and doing great but even with this, I will still set some big goals to create more passion in my life!

Refire Your Life

I’ve written a bit about retirement recently, and how it kind of kicked me in the face, mostly because I hadn’t made enough plans or lined up enough activities to fill my life and all those hours that were suddenly open and free. The big problem was I hadn’t realized I needed to plan all those “to do” things so, instead of enjoying being able to do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted, I found myself going a bit crazy.

This really surprised me but I hadn’t really thought about how important a routine, a purpose, or a to-do list was. Once I started to understand what was missing, I did set up new goals and tried to come up with, and stick to, a daily and weekly routine and it worked for me. Well, at least somewhat. There were still tough days to deal with.

Then, recently, I came across a book—I think one of my kids gave it to me. Its title, Refire! Don’t Retire, really grabbed me, as did the subtitle, Make the Rest of Your Life the Best of Your Life, by Ken Blanchard and Morton Shaevitz.  It’s a great book that has motivated me to plan more, set better routines, and go after more in life.

The author outlines four keys to the best life: Emotional, Intellectual, Physical, and Spiritual. This made me look closer at each of these areas of my life.

After reading this great book I concluded that I certainly couldn’t play tennis, my favorite game, all day, every day, so I decided to look at other things I could do that would give me great satisfaction and use up my free time.

When I stopped to really look, wow, did I find plenty of things to put on my list. There is everything from spending more time planning stuff with my family and friends to going out of my way to meet new people. Then I also thought, “Wait a darn minute. What have I always loved to do and now can do even more of? That big something that I’ve always loved is traveling. Yes, it takes money and can take quite a bit of work to plan, but that is just another thing I get to do with my free time.

I’ve found, over the years, that traveling to new places expands and excites the mind and we can all learn so much from looking at and being with other cultures and in other countries. It really does open up your life.

Then another thought that I haven’t followed through on yet, but I will, is to do more coaching and teaching of others, young or old, about the things I’ve learned about life and living. I want others to know that life is fun and fulfilling but it really does help to help others. I’ve had so many people come up to me or write to thank me for showing them the way to make a fortune and the many ways there are to expand their lives. Doing that has been the most rewarding part of all. It is better than money even.

Words For Financial Success & Beyond

We just arrived in Kauai, and I realize it was time to write my next blog post. So I found an old blog I wrote years ago that includes a few friends who contributed to a little book I wrote called, A Beginner’s Guide to Investing in Real Estate. Those good friends and fellow writers are Clair Crookston, Bryan Kroff, David Shamy, and Kelvin Miller. In the book, we all talked about making good investments in life, real estate, and other types of investments. So, in this week’s post, I wanted to quote from one of those friends and share with you the ideas and directions a person should follow to come up with, not just great financial returns, but great returns on life.

The purpose of one of the chapters that Brian Kroff contributed to was to develop a game plan that will work for you for any goal — financial, personal, or physical. Brian wrote that “your personal real estate game plan, strategies, and flexibility are just as critical,” as any other goals you might have.

He wrote a lot of great stuff, including this from his own great book: “The knowledge you have and will gain about real estate is what allows you to make wise decisions. When it comes to money, knowledge separates the investor from the speculators. Knowledge is the power to control, at least to a significant degree, what happens to us. Knowledge reduces risk.”

Additionally, he says, “Try to establish, as far as possible, a regular ‘information acquisition’ program. Some people try to read a few minutes each morning or evening. Some use their lunch or coffee break to feed the mind as well as the body. Carefully analyze your personal daily schedule, then set aside a certain time period each day to educate yourself as best you can about real estate.”

He doesn’t stop there. He goes on to say, “Fundamental to beginning in real estate is the establishment of your goals. Determine, as far as possible, how you can achieve them. Everyone is unique and different, so set your own goals. Don’t be afraid if your goals are a little bit different, higher, or even lower than someone else’s. Be specific about your goals and write them down.”

And it’s true. Writing goals down can make a huge difference in your level of success and reaching those goals! So, set your goals, write them down, do your research, and go after what you want.

Breaking Out of the Boredom

Recently, I’ve been writing about how keeping a record of one’s thoughts through a journal can be very helpful down the road. I’ve also recently found a few thoughts in those journals about how bored I became when I retired and some of the smart things I did that helped me with that.

If you are retired, you probably know what I’m talking about and if you are totally busy, working hard, long hours plus taking care of your home and family responsibilities, you might not hit that boredom thing very often. It’s funny how so many of us think of work as a negative thing, when, really, it’s a blessing. I think many retired people would agree.

So, what do you do if retirement has you bored out of your mind or, if you are not even close to retirement, you find yourself bored way too much with what you are doing now? Retired or not, what I’ve found, and continue to find, is that there are many different ways to cope when boredom becomes part of our lives, but there is one approach that I think works best.

One of the best solutions to any kind of boredom is to get busy and stay busy with projects you are passionate about. You want to push yourself to do things that are not just fun but that challenge you. Specifically, you want to projects that are well thought out and that fit with what you like to do, what you are good at, and what you find exciting and fulfilling. This might be a big goal, maybe something you’ve always dreamed of doing, but haven’t tried yet out of fear.

A big goal can really wipe away boredom. The challenge of trying something big, even the fear that might come with it, can give you a real mental boost. I remember how fulfilled and not at all bored I was when I decided to have a new house built for me in Kauai. No, I wasn’t the guy who poured the cement or swung the hammer, but I decided on the floor plan that fit my personality and figured out things what things fit my lifestyle—like good indoor-outdoor living spaces. Then, just about every day, there were decisions to be made and new things to learn so I could make the best decisions, and that stuff that kept me really busy so that I was rarely, if ever, bored.

I also went back to work after retiring. I wasn’t working like I used to, but I did enough to keep me busy, starting new and exciting projects. Since I was retired, I could choose to work on things I had always thought about doing but hadn’t had the time for yet. So, I wrote another book, started this blog, and set new, bigger travel goals.

So, if you’re a bit (or a lot) bored, may I suggest you look for something challenging and new to keep you busy? If you don’t have anything in mind right now, that can be your first big goal—to come up with a list of things you want to try or do. If you are just totally busy and never bored, then don’t change anything and be thankful. But also know that circumstances can change, so keep any eye out for that awful boredom and keep busy with exciting new goals.

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