Looking Back for Gratitude

Life can be so interesting, sometimes a bit crazy, and yet, still somewhat logical. However, when we look back at something that happened to us, our views can change over that time into something quite different, something that doesn’t seem all that logical but really isn’t all that crazy either.

I sure learned that recently. A week ago, I was walking in front of my house and, suddenly, I slipped on a wet spot and went down very hard. It was so hard and painful that l couldn’t stand up. Oh, the pain!

I kept trying to stand but just couldn’t get up. Fortunately,  I had my cell phone which I struggled to get out of my pocket. That caused even more pain. Finally, I got the phone out and called my wife who was in the house. She came out immediately and then struggled to help me get up. With her help I managed, but it wasn’t easy.  We went into the house, but the pain wasn’t going away, so Kimberly rushed me to the hospital where x-rays showed that I had cracked 4 or 5 ribs. They sent me home with pain pills but for more than a week now, the pain has interfered with so many things in my life.

One big lesson I was reminded of, again, since I’ve had similar upsetting events happen in recent years, is that we all should take time to appreciate the many things we have to be grateful for in our lives. I have many things to be grateful for, but I think we all could be helped by making a list of the good, and the great, things in our life. Do this then add to the list over time as you realize all the many things that you take for granted and don’t usually think about or feel thankful for until we lose them.

Life is filled with bad stuff that happens that we don’t see coming. It’s too bad we usually don’t take time to think of all the many good things we have in our life until after bad stuff happens. And that’s what I meant by looking back and seeing things that aren’t all that logical or crazy. How do we go about not realizing all the good things we have a lot more often?

So, I made a decision that I would think about all the good things in my life and, yes, I’m going to make a list of them and add to that the many wonderful experiences I’ve had in my life. And then I’m going to review that list from time to time so I remember them and can be more grateful more often.

My challenge to you, my readers, is to think about doing the same thing—list of all the good things in your life and then review that list from time to time, adding all the great things that you experience in your life, and be grateful. Then, next time you are hit with a bad event or a negative twist in your life, go back and re-read that list of all the good things you have. I’m preaching this to you but as I do that, I’m also preaching it to myself. Now let’s go make our lists.

The Important Stuff

On my wall, I put up a great poster that has, in large letters, that old USA symbol on it, but it’s not what you think. You may recall my writing about that USA thing some time ago. Do you remember what it stands for?

The large letters don’t stand for the United States of America, not in this case. They stand for Unconditional Self- Acceptance!  That big chart on the wall lifts my thinking and my mood and even if it’s just a short glance and a quick thought, it still lift my mind. So, I’ve made a habit of looking at the big sign on my bedroom wall almost every day and thinking about what it means. It’s amazing what those 3-letter do for my mind.

I would strongly suggest you get a sign like that up on your wall too. It could be the USA sign or make you own sign with those letters. Or choose something else that has been helpful for you. Just give yourself a reminder that makes you stop and think and appreciate yourself and what you have.  It’s so good for your mind and can help raise your mood.

Here are a few other thoughts that have helped lift my life, my mood, and my mind and that you might want to put up as a reminder in your own life.

1. Be grateful.
2. Stay physically active.
3. Don’t let your social life slip. In fact, try to make it bigger and better. Be an instigator of your social life by calling and inviting friends to do something with you and have them invite their friends.
4. Think about how you can motivate your family and friends to get out and join you for breakfast lunch, and dinner. Doing this not only raises your mood but the mood of the people who come along.
5. Stay healthy and eat smart.
6. Do what works for you. It might be reading certain books or writing your own book, even if you are not planning to have it published. Such goals can give you a huge boost of confidence and can lift your mood.
7. Travel and experience new places and people. Wow, I sure loved my around the world trip with my wife, meeting all those wonderful and interesting people, some who were very famous and successful people.
8. Teach your kids and friends what works for you to lift your mind and your life and explain how it can help them too.
9. Be sure to live in and appreciate the great right now moments!

That’s just a short beginning list. I could add many more items to my list but I don’t want to bore you or take any  more of your time. However, I bet you can add a ton to the list as well. And you should! They might all be things you are already very aware of but we all need reminders to keep focused on all the great important stuff.

Gratitude Amidst Tragedy

Such sad, sad days for our family, especially my younger brother Scott, his kids, and his grand kids. Scott’s wonderful wife, Pat, died a few days ago. No, it wasn’t the Covid-19 virus. She has been struggling with health issues for quite some time. Wow, I feel so bad for my brother. For me, it brought back some very sad times and memories.

When I was 15 years old, my older brother Bruce, who was 17, died right in front of me on an outdoor basketball court in Ankara, Turkey where our family lived from 1959-1961. My brother’s death was devastating for me and I felt so guilty for many years thinking I should have saved him.

Unfortunately, there was a more devastating and tragic event for me that almost did me in. Many years after the tragedy of my brother’s death, my 16-year-old daughter Kristin died. That was, and still is, the biggest and most tragic event of my life. Scott’s wife’s death brought these two terrible events in my life forcefully back to my brain.

When I think of other cultures that are in the mist of war, poverty, and starvation, I realize I really don’t have it so bad. Another thought that helps my brain a bit – something that should help all of us get through the pain of losing a family member, loved one, or a dear friend – is the absolute fact that nobody gets out of this life alive. All of us pass away eventually. It is simply part of life.

One powerful lesson we should take to heart is that life is quite short, so we need to train and push ourselves to live life to the fullest. Live more fully in the great “right now” moment.

Love more.

Live more.

Give more.

And push yourself to fully understand how important those 3 things are in our lives.

For me, it is very helpful to make a list of all the good people and things in my life, reminding myself how grateful I should be to live in today’s world. I call it my gratitude list and when I feel a little down, I re-read that list. I highly recommend that everyone make their own GRATITUDE LIST and add to it every time you think of another thing in your life that makes you feel grateful!

 

Motivation in Words

It happened at the airport. I was in big hurry-I had to get a 13-year-old German boy on his plane back to Berlin. As I ran down the concourse, a handsome, 40ish stranger said as I hurried by, “Hey Mark, good to see you.”  I had no clue who he was, but I waved and kept running. Five minutes later, after they boy was on the plane, the stranger approached me again. This time he put out his hand and introduced himself.

He told me how he bought my first book How to Wake Up the Financial Genius Inside You and gave me credit for making him tons of money and dramatically improving his life. The chance meeting was a catalyst and a huge motivator for me to keep writing so that I might help more people with their financial lives. There are not many things that make me feel more content and satisfied as being told that I helped a person make a fortune which lifted their lives to a new level.

I’ve had so many people thank me for writing my books, my blogs, for sharing my methods, formulas, and experience, that I am sometimes overwhelmed. But it also motivates me to write more. I’m a total believer in the power of setting goals, but there is a critical part of goal setting that many people don’t use and that critical part is a pretty simple process that almost guarantees that you will reach the goals that you set: it’s the simple act of writing your objectives and goals down on paper or on your iPad or computer. By doing that, you more permanently plant the goal in your mind and the likelihood of reaching that goal increases exponentially.

Anne Klauser, in her great little book, Right It Down… Make It Happen, talks about the huge power of writing your goals down and what it does that pushes you to follow through and reach the goals that you’ve set for yourself. Quoting her, she said, “Writing it down feeds the inner mind… the other than conscious mind.”  There is something in that inner mind that drives a person to go after and reach the goal that was set.

She goes on to say, “Create your own list of what is meaningful to you. List your intentions and begin your day by writing them down.” Do that enough and it will become a habit that you don’t even have to think about.

Personally, I’ve noticed that when I write down my goals—long term or even just a to do list for today—it’s like my brain won’t leave me alone and it coaxes me to follow through and do what my list tells me to do.  It’s almost like magic, the way it works in my head. It doesn’t seem to matter whether my goals are putting aside time to work out, taking my 20,000 steps a day, a list of people I need to talk to, or even taking time to write this blog, my brain works overtime to make sure I get it done.

If you haven’t been writing down your goals and to do lists, try it and I think you will be impressed and pleasantly surprised how much more you’ll get done and how much progress you’ll make towards your big goals not to mention finishing your daily list of goals, which always feels great.

 

A List to Start the Day

A few weeks ago, I talked about how important that first hour of your day can be as the book, The Miracle Morning, talks about. I would add one critical thing that you can do to make that first 60 minutes of your day so much more productive and beneficial to your life – write down, the night before, the items and tasks that you want to address the next morning. Write what you want to concentrate on for those first 60 minutes. You can break it down to six 10 minute items or four 15 minutes tasks, but no matter how you do it, making a list can, and will, greatly increase the odds of you following through on what you want to accomplish.

There is something magic that happens in your brain when you reduce your desires to a list. When you write those items down, it’s like your brain pushes you to act on them and won’t let you go until you do it.

In my book, How to Ignite Your Passion for Living, I have a chapter entitled “Clone Yourself with the Amazing ‘L’ Factor”.  Show me any super-successful person who has accomplished big things and I’ll show you an accomplished list maker. Yes, you can clone yourself by the wise use of list making, plus some good old-fashion delegation.

Of the many specific techniques that have huge value in helping catapult a person to the top of whatever they’re going after, I have to say that list making is at, or near, the top of that list. For some reason most people tend to put a much higher value on just about anything that is on a written list. It’s just flat-out amazing how much more enhanced your life will become and how many more dreams and goals you will be able to achieve by using lists. In addition, daily task lists or to-do lists are the key to keeping track of accomplishing all the bite-size components into which you’ve broken down your big picture goals.

So, if you have gotten away from that ole list making habit, it’s probably a good time to start making lists in order to drive yourself to get lots of stuff done. And I don’t mean just for that first hour of the day, but make lists for your big, huge goals and read over your list often, checking off those items that you’ve accomplished. Then you can give yourself a nice pat on the back for getting the job done!

Prioritizing Your Lists

Last week’s blog challenged you to become the next Richard Branson. I’m still waiting for that invitation to jump in your hot air balloon and travel over the Atlantic Ocean! But, more importantly, I hope my words got you thinking about list making.

I ended my previous blog, which was all about how successful you can be when you make lists, by asking the question, “How important is it to prioritize your list?”

Of course, the answer is that prioritizing your lists are absolutely critical, that is, if you want to do much bigger and better things!  However, most of us humans after we’ve made a list, will often make the mistake of NOT prioritizing the items on them. You may be thinking, “Hey, everybody knows you should prioritize!” And that may be true, but most people simply don’t do it, even if they know it’s very important!

I’m acquainted with many bright and intelligent people who treat virtually situation – every business deal, and every contact – equally. Ok, I’ve been guilty of doing that myself from time to time. People will even let a very low priority phone call or even a walk-in salesperson interrupt a high priority project or meeting that they are involved in. They have no sense of priority. They often move from one small, easy item to another small, easy item on their “to do list”, simply because they are easy and to get them out of the way.

Once in a while, if there is still time in the day, they’ll finally get to some important items, or even a top priority item. I’m sure most of us have done this, on occasion, but we need to realize that leaving our top priority items until later will hurt our progress and productivity to a large degree.

If we give it some advance thought and plan our day, we are more likely to stop ourselves from “taking the easy way” and not be oblivious to the great power of doing the top priority items first. Probably the biggest reason all of us can, and do, too often leave the top priority items until later is that those are usually very challenging and very difficult, and people just don’t want to push themselves. They do the easier, lower priority and only moderately important items first so they can check them off the list. I guess it makes them feel good or feel like they’re getting more done that way.

Have I taken the easy road myself?  Yes, of course I have. Most of us are very human in that way and we slip up once in a while. Sometimes we slip up more often than that. But by knowing that’s the wrong way to approach my list, I can concentrate on giving the top priority items a top priority position on my list which will help me reach great heights in my life.

If you dwell on this idea and acknowledge the fact that doing the easy things on your list first can keep you from accomplishing great things, you are much more likely to prioritize properly. And when you do slip up, and am totally aware of that slip up, you need to admit that to yourself and take corrective action. I am sure you can do this because I can and I’m pretty sure, you and I are not that different.

A Billionaire and a Popstar

I’m sure you’ve taken note of certain people whose lives seem packed full of many marvelous activities, adventures, and experiences. Have you ever wondered how they do it all? Well, a big part of their success is that they are good at making, keeping, and working off of lists.

A good example is British billionaire Sir Richard Branson, who credits his lists of things he wants to accomplish as the key to his getting so much done. He takes the time to go down that list often, adding to it and checking off each item as it is completed.

Here’s a guy who, at the tender age of 25, had the nerve to make a $100,000 offer to buy the Caribbean island of Necker that was listed for sale at $6 million dollars. No, the seller didn’t accept that low ball offer but, later, Branson did buy the entire island for a mere $180,000 which ended up being one of his favorite paradise getaways. And get this … his super luxury cabin rents out for $65,000 a night! Wow. That’s my kind of real estate investment – a place you can rent out, when not using it for yourself, that provides a super great cash flow.

Today, his Virgin group of businesses owns more than 200 different companies. Among these companies are businesses that specialize in air travel, finance, retail sales, music, cell phones, internet, hotels, and even a railroad. In 1999, Branson attempted, and broke, world records in hot air balloon travel and in a transatlantic small boat crossing.

Pop star, Madonna, also has a reputation as a big list maker. Although her accomplishments are in different areas than Branson’s, she attributes her list-making to keeping track of her priorities and getting so much done.

Lists are one of the secrets used by the rich and famous every day of their lives. They help them to run their businesses and to expand their ventures. List making is a common trait of millions of successful people regardless of race, sex, nationality, or occupation. Lists are used to lift their lives and propel them toward fulfillment. And lists can do the same for you and me!

Once again, as I write about this, it truly motivates me to make more lists and be more consistent in doing just that. But here’s a good question to end on: How important is it to “Prioritize” your lists?  We’ll talk about that next week.

In the meantime, how about you or your son or granddaughter become the next Branson? Hey, it could happen, and then maybe you will invite me to a hot air balloon ride across the Atlantic!

The Powerful Link Between PA’s and Goal Setting

All this talk of positive affirmations (PA’s) got me thinking about the critical and close connections between PA’s and goal setting. Is there a serious connection between the two?? Absolutely!

PA’s really are the basics of goal setting. A goal is obviously something you’ve thought about and decided it’s important enough to act on. If you’re smart you will have written it down. If you’re really smart you will have also put a deadline on it. By doing this you’ve feed a message to your mind and reinforced it by making a visual note on paper and, yes, your subconscious, which has just been sitting there waiting for directions, is now being told what to do and what to believe.

So no matter what the goal is that you’ve stored in your mind and put on paper, the ever vigilant and very smart subconscious says “Ok … that’s what you want to do so we’ll do it!” Remember it doesn’t matter whether it’s positive or negative –your subconscious doesn’t care. It will get to work on it as soon as you plant the seed and keep working on it even while you sleep or think about something else. That sneaky inner brain obeys and thinks “I’ll keep at this until you call me off or change your mind and goals.”

Of course, if you feed it negative stuff or if you don’t keep practicing positive PA’s the subconscious (SubCon) will be just as content to let the negative PA’s dominate — remember it just doesn’t care–it’s job is to do what you tell it to do without question. That is pretty powerful stuff.

Living a Life of Quality

With age, and the experience of achieving great success, it has become glaringly clear that wealth, power, status, fame, possessions, etc. do not, by themselves, add anything significant to the actual quality of our lives. Yes, I find having wealth is nice and allows me to do many wonderful things such as travel (like I am right now!), and I do thoroughly enjoy many of my physical possessions like my new house and all the bits and pieces my wife has brought in to make it a home, but these things are not how I measure how well I live.

Most of what makes a life worth living is not to be bought or collected but can be found in the experiences you have, what you give to others, what you accept, and how you choose to look at the world. It’s those many small steps that make up the journey that determine the true importance of the destination, not the destination itself.

If your ‘destination’ is great wealth, gaining that wealth will only be important if you’ve lived well, struggled often, and celebrated your small successes along the way. This is why lottery winners almost always end up unhappy. There was no journey, no sense of success and no memories that made up the path to their wealth. The money just became a condition of their life, not something that engaged their sense of personal acheivement.

This idea brings together much of what I’ve been talking about these past few weeks. Live in the moment, because these moments are what your life is truly made of. Choose to be happy or your life will be made of many disappointing moments and thus your life will be disappointing. And don’t forget to look for joy in the wonderful act of giving to others, acts that will infuse your life with the kind of treasure that you could never buy or fabricate.

Go ahead and go for the wealth and the status and whatever else you dream of. Just remember to live a quality life along the way, and keep up your passion for living, not just for the future life you’re after.

Making it Through a Hectic Day

You might have already noticed that no matter how well you map out the steps you need to take to reach your goals or how intent you are on hitting every deadline you set for yourself, you don’t always manage it. Sometimes unexpected circumstances arise and other people need your time, attention, and support. It’s important that you make the needs of your family and friends one of your priorities-—helping them and others is a big part of living a fulfilling, passionate life–but you must never forget to take care of yourself as well.

I know this can often be very difficult and some days you just want to throw your hands up in surrender. Well don’t. No matter what is happening you really can help the people you care for, keep making progress on your own goals, and keep sane all at the same time. The way to do this is to use that “L” factor I talk about in Chapter 8 of my book, How to Ignite Your Passion for Living–list making.

Lists are the ideal life line for when things get hectic so be sure you make a list of what you want to get done for yourself and others every day. Then when the proverbial wrench gets thrown into your plans get the issue resolved or the interruption wrapped up as soon as possible and return to your list. Don’t worry if it takes hours to get back on track or even the next day. The important thing is to keep the list as the guideline for your day so you don’t get sidetracked or lost in the chaos.

You will also find that if you complete the items according to their priority for that day that even if you are interrupted, the most important things still get done. Anything left undone should be transferred to the next day’s list and made a priority for that day. If one or two of your top priorities are steps toward accomplishing your goals, you are certain to make the progress you need to keep up your enthusiasm and eventually accomplish what you are after. Because, in the end, it’s not how quickly you reach your goal but that you have something to strive for that fuels your passion and creates a life worth celebrating.