Living Large Despite Failing

Back in 2015, Mitt Romney, the 2012 GOP candidate for President, made some powerful comments to graduating students at Utah Valley University. He advised the students he spoke in front of “to experience a fulfilling, purposeful life.” He called that living “a large life”. What great advice. We all need to go out and live large, not just when we’re young, but throughout our entire lives.

However, people often hesitate to live large. Why? Because most of the time, they fear their potential failure.

“Failures don’t have to define who you are,” Romney said in that same speech. “Through all my occupations, I have experienced successes and failures. I am asked what it felt like to lose to President Obama. Well, not as good as winning. Failures aren’t fun, but they are inevitable.”

The thing about failures is that they come hand in hand with success. It seems to me, from my experience, that the number of failures I’ve had is in direct proportion to how large I’ve tried to live. So, yes, I’ve had a ton of failures, but some of those have led to some huge successes. And the reason for those successes was that I learned so much from my failures.

I remember one huge loss that I learned a valuable lesson from that then led me to some very, very large successes. I had decided to lend a large amount of money using a restaurant as collateral. Big mistake on my part! Why? Because I don’t know much about that kind of business, so if it failed, I certainly wouldn’t know how to run it. And guess what? It did fail, and I lost almost all of what I had loaned.

What did I learn? Well, first I found out that restaurants have a very high rate of failure and, second, I learned that I shouldn’t stray from what I know best. Not that I shouldn’t ever loan money, but if I do, I should loan it on assets that I understand as well as being on improved real estate which, ideally, would also be income producing.

With those guidelines in mind, I forged ahead and made many millions of dollars’ worth of loans that were backed up by more familiar types of real estate. Those ventures were largely very successful. Later, I discovered that I could do even better by owning the right kind of income-producing properties. I also, very successfully, ventured into the development of condos and warehouses, where the profits were even bigger. Those did come with increased risks, but they were risks I was willing to take because I knew enough to be comfortable with those types of properties. Much, if not most, of the success I had in those ventures came from lessons learned from my failures and my efforts to live large.

Now, living large for you may not be about investing in real estate. It will mean different things to different people, but keep in mind that the term refers to more than making money. As Romney says, it’s about “expanding your world and engaging in your world, constantly learning, nourishing friendships, overcoming reversals and servicing others.” In other words, there are plenty of opportunities for you to live large in a way that is meaningful to you and boosts your life and the life of those around you.

So, what are you doing, or will do, to live large and take your life to the next level?

A Bold Night

Recently I read a list of 10 traits one sees in millionaires and found the list to be very much in line with my own experience, especially points like “not afraid of taking risks” and being the types that just go out there and “do it” without worrying about the possibility of failing.  There is much I’d like to discuss with you about the things on this list but this week, I want to zero in on risk taking and how it can pay off in many parts of your life.

Last weekend my wife booked tickets to the great historic Egyptian Theatre located in Park City, Utah.  It’s a wonderful place that books many talented actors, dancers and singers.  We went to see one of the original singers from The Supremes, Mary Wilson.

Wow, what a great voice she still has all these years later. She gave an absolutely wonderful performance and ended the concert by asking if any women wanted to join her on her last song.  I’m not sure if she invited any men to join in but no men took to the stage.  I was really into her music and performance and felt so turned on. I really wanted to join her along with that bunch of pretty ladies on stage but she was ending the song and I was afraid to go up and maybe totally embarrass myself.  I thought about it for maybe 15 seconds and then said to myself, “I’ve done all this preaching about not worrying about failure or embarrassment so why sit here? Just get up and go do it!”

Well, even though I was very unsure of myself, doing something that I’ve never done before, I just jumped up and got onto the stage and began singing and dancing with all those women.  And what happened?  Well, I had a wonderful time and all the women seemed to love that I joined them. Mary Wilson made a special fuss over me, even pulling me into her side as the song came to an end and, WOW … did we ever get a great standing ovation! Not only that, I met all her backup singers and musicians back stage.

Later my wife and I had a nice chat with Mary about success and what it takes to make it big. And yes, overcoming fear of failure and just “doing it” is high on that list.  There was an additional bonus for my boldness and that was the number of people that came up to me afterward to give congratulations for my boldness, saying they wish they’d done the same thing.  And now we even have a few new friends in Park City.

A big plus was that the theatre sent pictures of me on stage with Mary! Now, this experience certainly won’t turn me into a great singer, but I had an incredible evening and I re-learned that great lesson of overcoming the fear of failure.  I certainly used that lesson as I built my financial fortune, overcoming fear and pushing forward even though I knew there were risks I was taking.

We all need to keep telling ourselves to take some risks and push ourselves to overcome fear of failure.  I would hope you too will keep working on this one and, please, pass this lesson on to your kids and grandkids and friends, especially those that you see needing a little help in this department.