The Secret to a Great, Happy, and Productive Life
You can greatly enhance your life no matter what age you are by doing something very, very simple. What is this simple cost free secret? Well, it’s not so much a secret as something most of us forget about and stop doing as we age. I am talking from personal experience, especially now as I am nearing the BIG 70!!
Ok, so what the heck is this big secret? It’s simply “Action.†That’s right it’s Action and Movement. It’s getting up off your butt both physically and mentally. Deepak Chopra and Rudolph E. Tanzi in their wonderful book Super Brain give some very powerful evidence that physical exercise and movement along with environment enhancement stimulates the growth of new neurons. And this happens at any age!
You, no doubt, have experienced a big lift in your mood, on days you were kind of of feeling down and out, by merely taking a walk or even just getting up from watching TV and taking a drive in the country or through your own or a new neighborhood. I know if I push myself to take even a short hike in the mountains or on the beach it gives my brain a huge mood boost. Ditto by doing a few push-ups, sit ups or jumping on the stair master for 15 or 20 minutes
There is a great quote in “Super Brain†that I love. It says it all–“Inertia is depression’s best friend.” Simple but true.
So, remember, action is the KEY! Keep moving and make a point to do so every day. Let me give you just a few of the benefits you’ll get from being active.And  I hope you will add to this list the things you’ve learned from your own experience.
BENEFITS OF ACTION AND MOVEMENT—
- Feeling increasingly better the more you stay in motion- and that is for physical and mental activity.
- Getting a whole bunch of stuff done—financially, socially, spiritually, helping others, etc.
- Overcoming depression and bad moods without drugs.
- Losing weight.
- Staying in shape and having overall better health.
- Helping others by your example.
- Slowing the aging process.
- Increasing brain cells and brain activity.
- Greatly reducing the chance of dementia.
Do think about action and movement and please challenge yourself to do more in that direction. You’ll see how much difference it makes to your happiness, your mood and your satisfaction in your life.
Compounding Generosity
If you’ve read either of my books, How to wake up the-Financial Genius Inside You or How to Ignite Your Passion for Living, you know how big I am on the concept of compounding. Compounding your investments has to do with keeping the income you make off your investment in the game so that you make new income off the previously created income allowing your revenue to grow exponentially. This concept can actually be applied to many things. If you saw the movie, Pay it Forward, you saw a good deed and the gratitude that came from it compounded. Instead of the one good act being the only good act and the thanks only being returned once, the idea was passed onto multiple people who passed the generosity onto several people each and soon the world was “paying it forward”.
This is the concept behind viral and word of mouth marketing. Tell someone or a group of people and encourage them to share their enthusiasm for your product or service and hopefully the news will continue to spread and grow your market. We’ve all seen this happen with viral videos. A few people see it, pass it onto a group of friend who pass it onto a group of friends and next thing you know a million people have seen it!
When you give of yourself this season–be it money, time, knowledge or just a kind word–ask yourself if there is any way to compound the gesture. If you give money, it will compound if you give it to a charity that helps poor communities build commerce which will increase the community’s wealth and ability to financially sustain it. If you teach a young person a new skill, like how to invest (see the wonderful email I received and shared in the post last week), encourage them to share what they learned and ask those they teach to share it as well. Then your time with this one person will end up helping maybe dozens or hundreds of people or more.
Of course, if all you can do is give a few more people encouragement and a kind word, the good intentions and good cheer will usually get spread simply because you made someone feel better and that feeling tends to make others want to do the same. Generosity is self-perpetuating. And that, in a nutshell, is true compounding!
How to be Thankful: Live in the Now
It is not usually the moment we are in that worries or upsets us. Yes, a certain moment can get us riled up but if you think about it, it’s our dwelling on the past or worrying about the future that keeps us from enjoying life, from enjoying the moment we have at hand.
Dwelling on the past or possible future does you no good. What has happened is no longer in your circle of control and as for the future, do the best you know how and the future will play out the best that it can. What you have at any given moment is the only thing that matters, the only thing you have any real control over. And the control you have is choosing to enjoy and appreciate what you have right now or ignoring it for the pointlessness of the unchangeable and the unknowable.
Be thankful for the good things you know are part of your life as it exists now, for the friends, family and talents you have. Regret and worry do nothing but cause you to conjure up dissatisfaction in what has already happened and what might happen, clouding your perception of the wonderful things you do actually have. There is a saying, “Past is History, Future is a Mystery and Today is Gift and hence it is called the Present”. Enjoy the present, as a present to yourself and all those around you. Find your joy, make your own happiness in the one certain and controllable thing you have … the moment you are living right now.
The Healing Power of Laughter
I know the subject matter has been a little heavy the last couple posts–not that it’s any wonder after spending those couple weeks in the hospital watching over my wife. She is doing better every day, by the way. Thank you all for your support and well wishes.
I want to talk more about taking care of yourself but this time, I want to talk about one of the easiest ways to help keep your mind, body and spirit in good shape–laughing. I think human beings have always known that laughter had wonderful side benefits. You even see a reference in the Old Testament to the healing properties of humor: “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine.†Although life can be difficult and, at times, discouraging, you can always inject a little humor into your day to pick you up and reduce your worry.
Norman Cousins, in his book “Anatomy of an Illness,†strongly believes that humor cured his debilitating disease. He watched old Marx Brothers movies and allowed himself to laugh uncontrollably. Eventually, he was able to overcome his disease and lived a long and healthy life into his 80s. By laughing!
Laughter has been shown to reduce pain, bolster the immune system and decrease destructive levels of stress. The process of making a joke about something we find dire or frightful can also put situations and how we deal with them into perspective and show us these things aren’t as overwhelming or as scary as they might first appear.
So, if things are getting tough, just remember to laugh (appropriately of course!) Laugh at yourself, laugh at difficult coincidences, look for the silliness in a situation and just let yourself laugh. When you need outside help with this, do as Norman did and watch a funny show or movie or read a humorous book. Get together with friends and let them know you need a good laugh and see if things don’t start to look much brighter and lighter.
**If you like what you’ve read in this blog please send it on to people you know and love, to people who you think this message and information may be very helpful. There is nothing in the world that brings greater satisfaction than helping other people. Don’t you agree?
Changing for Better Health BEFORE the Alarms Go Off
Sometimes it takes huge bells on a gigantic clock to wake us up enough to change our thoughts and our habits. But, sadly, too many times when the alarm goes off we hit the snooze button or even sleep right through the loud ringing. I had the opportunity to see quite a few wake-up alarms going off at the hospital in Boston where my wife underwent a difficult surgery and I hope to permanently learn from them.
One such alarm was seeing and talking to a patient who had half her lungs taken out 5 weeks before but was back in the hospital with blood clots. Her husband took me aside and told me how sad it was. His wife smoked but never a lot. Still, she couldn’t seem to give it up. He was really hoping that this was a loud enough wake up bell that she wouldn’t hit the snooze button this time.
Another thing that really hit me was seeing so many obese people in the halls. This wake-up call was more one of empathy for them, knowing many were there for obese related problems. I realized that even though the alarm was going off for them, food addiction is even harder to give up than smoking! Unlike cigarettes, you can’t totally stop eating food, so in a way a person who overeats is constantly teasing and tempting himself or herself every time they eat.
Being in a hospital environment, there are many instances where you are exposed to the problems people have with taking care of themselves. The big take away, at least for me, is knowing that we all need to be much more observant, to see our own selves clearly and see what we need to be doing to stay healthy. We need to figure out better paths to go down before we get the big wake up calls. Additionally, I would say–don’t hit the snooze button! Go out and make the necessary changes—now!
**If you like what you’ve read in this blog please send it on to people you know and love, to people who you think this message and information may be very helpful. There is nothing in the world that brings greater satisfaction than helping other people. Don’t you agree?
The Positive Activity List
We all have great wants and desires. Without them we’d have virtually no motivation to do anything. But there are a lot of hidden land mines that lie in our path just waiting for us to step on them and explode our dreams, desires, and goals. Our very wants and desires that are so important to our lives of passion can make us absolutely miserable if we don’t know what to do with ourselves.
As McGonigal states in her wonderful book The Willpower Instinct, “… desire is neither good nor bad–what matters is where we let it point us.”
We all know that frustrated desires can lead us to search out bad or negative ways to boost or otherwise change our mood—-by using drugs and/or alcohol, binge eating, or even going on a shopping spree. These all work well to increase dopamine and serotonin—those mood altering chemicals in our brain—giving us a high and one that can be addictive. These activities can too easily and too quickly become detrimental to our health, our finances, and our relationships. But what if you were able to increase these mood altering chemicals with something positive and productive, gaining a natural high and moving towards your goals at the same time?
I am sure anyone of us can come up with a few examples of positive activities and actions that will improve rather than harm our lives but let me give you some of my list. You can use these as a start or as examples for your own list. Use your positive experiences and what you want out of life to help create the ideas for your list.
Then when you feel yourself turning towards those old tried and true (and negative and harmful) options, chose something from this positive list instead. Do this diligently for at least a week and take note of how much better you feel about yourself and your life. I bet you’ll not only enjoy the activities you’ve used as substitutes but you will be much happier overall, looking back at all the positive and productive things you did.
Here is my list:
1. Work out: Just 6 or 12 minutes on the stair master, doing sit-ups and push-ups or using weights
2. Get a tennis game going
3. Write out my bests thoughts for the days
4. Read a good book
5. Listen to favorite music (create a custom playlist online)
6. Arrange a get together with family and friends
7. Get a massage
8. Hike or bike in mountains or just take a walk in the neighborhood
9. 5 to 10 minutes of meditation
10. 5 or 10 minutes of simple yoga
Now … what goes on your list?
**If you like what you’ve read in this blog please send it on to people you know and love, to people who you think this message and information may be very helpful. There is nothing in the world that brings greater satisfaction than helping other people. Don’t you agree?
Family is Where the Heart Lies
On the eve of our Christmas weekend, I have to say my thoughts are very much with my family. I am truly blessed to have such a wonderful, supportive, fun, and loving family. I know many of you feel the same way. But on the other hand, I have known too many people that don’t have strong bonds with their relatives. The reasons for this are all over the map but in the end, these reasons aren’t as relevant as realizing what family really means and being with your true family on the holidays.
The phrase “Home is where the heart is” can be easily transformed into “Family is where the heart is”. It’s the same thing. I saw a news segment this week about a gentleman who won the lottery but without even a bit of hesitation has already determined he will not be leaving his job. Why? Because, he says, his work crew is his family. That is where he feels he belongs and no amount of money is going to buy him that feeling anywhere else. I thought that was great.
I hope you all are able to be at the place where your heart lies this weekend, where the people who make you feel loved and that you belong among them are gathered around you. If it’s not actually your relatives, then hopefully you are surrounding yourself with those friends who know you well, the people you laugh with and the people who are there for you 24/7. This weekend, I hope you are exactly where you want to be and make sure all those around you know how much they are loved and appreciated.
A very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you all.
My Three Minute Friend
Last week I was at Wal-Mart and a single mom in line just in front of me was holding a few extra items as the clerk added up the bill. She kept asking what the total was as she anxiously clutched the extra possible purchases. When the total got to 40 dollars she told the clerk that would be all and she laid the other items aside saying she only had 40 dollars.
As she paid for her purchases, I reached over and pushed the items she was leaving behind over to my pile. “I want to buy those items for my new friend,” I told the clerk. I bought them and handed them to her and, wow … she thanked me over and over again. And so did the clerk!
I walked out of the store feeling on top of the world. You’d think I had given her 1000 dollars although it was in reality only a $7.49 gift. On the other hand, it felt like a million dollars in satisfaction and warm feelings for me.
Even though I have done this type of thing many times before and for a lot more money, it never fails to feel like a unique and special experience. This last experience felt especially wonderful. Maybe it was that look in her eye that let me know this truly made a difference for her this holiday season–not just because of the few dollars I spent but because a complete stranger cared enough to help. She said Merry Christmas to me several times as she took her 7 year old daughter by the hand (who, of course, had a new 2 dollar bill that I had given her for “good Luck” like I so often do.)
I know a whole lot of people who do this same thing–there was a report on the news recently about a rash of anonymous people going into Wal-Marts and paying off layaways for complete strangers, some spending thousands of dollars so they could help multiple families! What I did was not unique but it might be for some of my readers. So I thought I ought to remind you all, once again, that if you have never done this type of thing to go out and give it a try. You will be so surprised at the great feeling that it gives you and the stranger that receives your gift. Try it at least once. I promise you’ll love it.
Positivity Outlooks Take Practice
One last note on this positive/negative inner chatter issue–well, maybe not my last note ever but at least for a while. As I’ve said before knowing something is not useful until you actually do something with the knowledge. We’ve talked quite a bit about this subject here and there the last few months, but have you done anything to actually improve your inner voice’s attitude?
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Years ago I really got into programming my brain with lots of positive thoughts and positive affirmations but I’ve been slipping on that the last 10 or maybe even 20 years because I thought that I was beyond that kind of stuff.  The thing is, I didn’t lose the knowledge but I did fall out of practice with it, and that was key. You can’t say you’re a great tennis player no matter how well you know the sport, unless you’re actually out there practicing and playing! With my loss in the final round of the Huntsman World Senior Games tennis match in which I had sabotaged myself with all my negative self-talk, I really started to think seriously about how much I let my thoughts turn pessimistic with worry and self-induced stress. I knew it was not helpful. I even knew how to combat it. I had just stopped putting this knowledge into practice.
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The great thing about this is that once you get the hang of it and practice enough you can use this positive reinforcement to change and improve just about any part of your life. From losing weight to overcoming addictions to making more money, you can stop worrying about so many things that add unnecessary stress to your life and actually live! Try it and I promise you that it works, especially if you keep practicing. So here’s what you and I must do … No. 1– start observing what that inner chatter is saying and, No. 2–feed yourself positive thoughts and affirmations, every single time you observe the self-talk going the wrong way. It’s not hard, it just takes practice!
The Real Measure of a Successful Life
I wanted to mention this book that Craig Horton, who I shared a letter from in my post last week, recommended. It’s a powerful book about mentorship titled “A Game Plan for Life-The Power of Mentoring” by John Wooden and Don Yaeger. Craig considers this one of the most powerful books he’s ever read. He’s not the only one.
The retired basketball player and coach mentored and inspired unknown numbers of people through his work as a coach and through his publications and lectures. In this, his last book, he first focuses on the people who helped foster his values then, through interviews excerpts, he turns the reader’s attention to number of his most successful mentorees, giving us an inside view of the affect good mentoring can have on an individual, not just as athletes but as human beings. Wooden is particularly focused on being successful without having to sacrifice principles. That is a focus I am behind 200%.
I really like Wooden’s philosophies and know you’d get something out of reading this book if you take what he says to heart. You see, how well you live is not purely about the success you have, even though in your mind and actions, it sure seems like it. The real measure of a successful life is how much you improve the lives of others. You can do this by sharing your success—be it monetary, career, personal, emotional, relationship, etc.–with others in ways that help them achieve and fulfill their lives as well.
