Accepting Our Differences

Have you ever noticed how life can be so very different for males versus females? When I observe the two sexes, I really am surprised by those differences. This is not about saying men are better than women or that women are better than men. Some people truly believe that one sex is better than the other, and sadly some religions and different cultures not only believe that but preach it as well.

Personally, I am very enamored with the differences. Here are a few examples that stand out to me when I see the men and women around me interact.

The first obvious one is what men wear versus women. For example, most men don’t spend a lot of time thinking about what they are going to wear. Women tend to take more time looking through their closet and picking just the right outfit for the day. Another difference, which I think is kind of cute, is that women, many times, will comment on another woman’s attire, saying things like, “I just love your outfit”. I don’t think I have ever heard a man say that to another man. Oh, yes, occasionally I’ll hear a woman compliment a man on his attire and we men do usually like that.

Then there is the big difference in talking. Women will talk to each other so much longer compared to men. Women seem to get more into the details and in a way that men usually don’t. I can always tell whether my wife is talking to a man on the phone or a woman, just by the length of the conversation.

In my experience, when two men meet it’s “Hey, bud, good to see you. How are you doing?” And their answer will be something like “I’m fine. Good to see you too.” Then maybe they’ll talk for a minute about work, sports, or some place they might be going, but that’s about it. Women, on the other hand, will ask dozens of questions and tell each other complete stories.

Men’s and women’s common habits are also very different. I don’t need to point out or talk about women painting their nails, putting on makeup, and so many other things that men, in general, don’t do. And men have just as many things they do that most women don’t.

Why am I pointing out all these obvious differences? Well, I just want to get across the idea that if men and women want to get along and love each other more, we need to fully accept our differences. We can learn so much from the other sex as well as from other people that are dramatically different from us. Those differences are what make us unique and give us opportunities to learn and see the world in a new way. Because of this, we should all pay more attention to those we may see as opposites and respect these other people not just regardless of those differences, but because of them.

Driving (and Living) Lessons

It’s amazing how much one can get out of visiting other countries. Not only are there the constant novel experiences but there is also so much to learn from their habits and cultures. I have now been to 74 countries and even lived in Turkey from 1959 to 1961 where I attend high school. But even so, every country is a surprise, a wonder, and a new lesson, opening my eyes to so many new and varied visions of life and living.

One thing that stood out while walking and being driven in the heavy, crazy traffic of Kathmandu was how the culture and habits of the people there differed so very much from our own. We saw so many near misses between cars and pedestrians, watched our drivers and others being regularly cut off by wildly driven vehicles, and heard so many, many horns. I mean Kimberly, I, and my two daughters, Nichol and Cammy, came within an inch or two of being hit by motorcycles as well as cars. It was quite scary at first but amazingly you get used to it. It’s just how it is there. Back home in Utah, if any of those things happened you most likely would get an angry look or get flipped off while in some other cities in the U.S. you even might get shot.

However, in India and Nepal, people never seem to get upset or mad at the honking, getting cut off, or nearly being hit. It would seem that living in very crowded conditions combined with the both the Hindu and Buddhist attitudes results in a very calm, non-defensive, understanding. It would be nice if we could realize, in our country, that things get crazy sometimes, but it’s just not worth the energy and unhappiness of being upset.

There is so much for us to learn from other countries and peoples. It’s a shame that everyone in the world can’t visit dozens of other countries and see how much we, as humans, are very much the same and that we can learn from our differences.