Adventures We Survive

Recently, I was going through a stack of old files and came across some of my past writings. I was quite surprised to find notes from an interview I did 20 years ago that talked all about my success in business and other successes in my life. My overall thoughts were, “Wow, I did all that, little old me!”

In these files, there were some interesting thoughts and stories like these things I wrote about back then:

Someone once said that life is a series of adventures that we learn to survive. We live each day either dodging what life throws at us or watching and holding it until we can figure out a way to pass it off. But it’s not only what life throws at us that we must deal with, it’s also our own decisions and their consequences that we must learn to survive.

This is a story of how one man’s search for financial freedom and personal identity became a series of adventures that changed his idea of what success meant to him. (Yes, I am talking about myself.) It’s a story that illustrates how the journey is surely more important that the goal itself. It is a reminder that in life, we are often awakened from our comfortable lives and asked again to perform.

In October 2001, a trial began at the federal courts. The Federal Trade Commission had been building a case of fraud against the American Home Business Association and its founder, Mark O. Haroldsen. Yep, that was me, and, wow, that lawsuit hit me like a ton of bricks. The amazing thing was I wasn’t even running the business then, but they knew I had plenty of money.

Years later, we finally went to federal court where the FTC put on many, many witnesses to try to support that multimillion-dollar lawsuit. I didn’t put on a single witness. I testified for myself and told the court that my company did nothing wrong nor did I. The case went on and on and after the FTC had put everything out on their case, the judge went into his private chambers and came out a short time later, delivering his verdict.

The court found me and my company totally innocent of any wrongdoing and basically said that the FTC should never have even filled a case against me. Then he gave them a bit of a lecture.

That case took years and the mental pressure, worry, and costs took a huge toll on me. I wouldn’t want to go through that again, but I am proud to say that I stood my ground and stood up for myself and the company I founded. I’m proud of what I did back then, and I not only survived, I kept working and I kept thriving. I didn’t need to dodge that particular challenge because I built my business with integrity, and it really paid off!

Actions and Practices in Self-Esteem

Having healthy self-esteem is a critical part of all of our lives. It is one of those attributes that can help us rise very high in business, within our social circles, and in terms of our happiness and self-confidence.

I was looking through a bunch of my old papers and came across some notes I made years ago while I was looking into a related thing that is so important to our lives—that being confidence. I want to share with you some of those notes that helped me better understand the importance of healthy versus low self-esteem, it’s role in my confidence level, and how I could build more of both in myself.

The sources of healthy self-esteem are mostly internal. In our brains we work on and build what we think of ourselves, and if we approach it correctly, we tend to have lots of confidence and work on bringing our self-esteem to higher levels.

No, you don’t need to achieve perfection overnight, but you can get so much from just small improvements designed to lift low self-esteem. We all need to be aware of the operations of our consciousness as your mind is the best tool for survival. You should be aware of everything and live in the present moment, seeing first, then knowing, then acting.

So, you may ask, what are these actions are we talking about? Well, here are some of them:

1. Have an active mind.

2. Be in the moment.

3. Reach toward relevant facts.

4. Know where I am relative to my goals.

5. Always be open to new knowledge.

6. See and correct mistakes.

7. Make commitments to learning and growth.

In addition, there are a few practices that can boost self-esteem. Here is a list of practices that I wrote down and regularly work on that seem to boost my self-esteem. These practices have helped lead to some great success in my business and personal life.

1. The practice of self-acceptance. (It’s sad that most of us are very hard on ourselves, even harder than we are on other people, and, of course, that self-judgment is quietly tucked in our minds and quietly reduces our self-esteem.)

2. The practice of self-responsibility.

3. The practice of self-acceptance.

4. The practice of living purposefully.

5. The practice of self-assertiveness.

6. The practice of personal integrity.

When self-esteem is low, we are usually motivated by fear. Fear is how we act. There is fear of being exposed, fear of failure, dreading the unknown, and change. Higher self-esteem looks for new frontiers, looks for opportunity, and looks for new and bigger challenges. Sadly, without a good level of self-esteem, we suffer with lots of anxiety and insecurity.

These guidelines were and are very helpful to me in building and maintaining my self-esteem. This is quite important to me now in my retirement years. I am also only a few years away from hitting that big 80 number. I’ve been keeping my tennis game up so I need to keep working on keeping my self-esteem up too! Hope these guidelines and suggestions are helpful to you!